Baby Onesies and the envelope folds: It happens to every parent sooner or later. You go to change your baby’s diaper and discover the most epic poop covering the entire surface area of the diaper. And then you make an even more ghastly discovery…
That poop has blown up through the top of the diaper, coating the back of your baby onesies in a hideous, gloppy poop mess.
Now you’ve got to change the onesie as well as the diaper and you struggle in vain to delicately remove the pooped-upon garment so as not to spread that vile, oozing mess onto other clean parts of your baby.
It’s an exercise in futility because you know that baby is not going to hold still while you try to help her, is she?
Of course not!
She’ll kick and flail and help spread that stinky poop all over the rest of her. And as an added bonus, she’ll get it on you too.
Sounds fun, right?
Yeah, not so much.
Which is why the internet practically broke when it first came to light what the onesie shoulder design was really all about.
Many of us thought it was just an attempt to be stylish AND avoid getting the baby’s head stuck while dressing and undressing. Not once did we consider that onesies are made this way to help parents and caregivers alike to easily remove soiled clothing without causing further unrest.
Yes, that’s right.
The easy way out of the poop hell was in front of us the entire time.
How To Dress A Baby In A Onesie:
All we had to do was roll the baby onesies off from the shoulders down to the feet.
And now that we know, we’re all sharing this earth-shattering knowledge in the hopes that we can save first-time parents from the agony that we once knew, before we realized that onesies are more convenient than we thought.
Sure, we cursed their little snaps at the crotch, but now we can praise the envelope folds up at the top for saving us from dragging a disgusting mess into our babies’ hair.
Of course, we’re all wondering why we were all collectively unable to realize this sooner.
Could it be that we’re all village idiots here?
Or could it be that it takes a village to raise a baby, and together, we can help each other by sharing our tales of woe, as well as our victories.
No, we’re not dumb.
I chalk it up to lack of sleep brought on by the world of parenting, and changing one too many diapers.